One Waulghing Worm What's yellow, wiggles and is dangerous?
A maggot with attitude!
Why was the glow worm unhappy?
Because her children weren't that bright!
What do worms leave round their baths?
The scum of the earth!
What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant?
Very big worm holes in your garden!
What reads and lives in an apple?
A bookworm!
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you!
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat?
A dirty kid!
What did the maggot say to another?
What's a nice maggot like you doing in a joint like this!
Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag?
They can lighten your load!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python?
A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death! Two Ripping Reptiles Where do frogs keep their money?
In a river bank!
What kind of bull doesn't have horns?
A bullfrog!
What jumps up and down in front of a car?
Froglights!
Why doesn't Kermit the Frog like elephants?
They always want to play leap frog with him!
Why was the frog down in the mouth?
He was un hoppy!
Why is a frog luckier than a cat?
Because a frog croaks all the time but a cat only gets to croak nine times!
What's a toad's favorite ballet?
Swamp Lake!
Whats green and can jump a mile a minute?
A frog with hiccups!
Why did the lizard go on a diet?
It weighed too much for its scales!
What do you call the English Toad Prize giving cermony?
The Brit Awarts!
Church of the Nazarene Broad Walk Knowle Park Bristol BS4 1BZ | Jokes Really realy corny jokes that I hope you'll love. If you have any suggestions for a good joke, bad joke, corny joke or christian joke (not that christians aren't good, bad or corny .. lol) send them to me and I will feature them here! (clean jokes please). Brought to you by the unfunnies at the Church of the Nazarene Knowle Park Bristol ( just kidding) we're not at the Church of the Nazarene (just kidding)! Some of these jokes are so bad I forgot to laugh! The Ed One Dog Disaster Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
A: Because you can't bury them in trees!
Q: Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
A: He was trying to make both ends meet!
Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
A: A collie-flower!
Q: Why do dogs wag their tails?
A: "Because no one else will do it for them!"
Q: Why didn't the dog speak to his foot?
A: Because it's not polite to talk back to your paw!
Q: What is the dogs favorite city?
A: New Yorkie!
Q: Who is the dogs favorite comedian?
A: Growlcho Marx!
Q: What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie?
A: "Well, doggone!"
Q: What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
A: He stole the show!
Q: How can tell if you have a stupid dog?
A: It chases parked cars!
Three Eerie Elephants What' s grey, has four legs and jumps up and down?
An elephant on a trampoline!
What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?
An elephant with hiccups!
What's grey and goes round and round?
An elephant in a washing machine!
What's grey and highly dangerous?
An elephant with a machine gun!
What's big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland?
The Loch Ness Elephant!
What's big and grey and has 16 wheels?
An elephant on roller skates!
What goes up slowly and comes down quickly?
An elephant in a lift!
What's as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
An elephant's shadow!
Last funny on 17 March, 2008 09:18 AM | One Flunny Fleathered Fliend Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet Q: Why did the turtle cross the road?
A: To get to the shell station Q: Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
A: Because it was stuck to the chicken!
Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
A: Because the chicken needed a day off Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side!
Q: Why did the chicken end up in the soup?
A: Because it ran out of cluck!
Q: What happened when the chicken ate cement?
A: She laid a sidewalk!
Q: What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of fried chicken?
A: She kicked the bucket!
Q: What do you call a crazy chicken?
A: A cuckoo cluck!
Q: What happened to the chicken whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way?
A: She was tickled to death!
Two heaps of farm funnies What do you get if you all sit under a cow?
A pat on the head!
What's the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper!
What do you call a pig that took a plane?
Swine flu!
What kind of doctor treats ducks?
A quack!
What did the well mannered sheep say to his friend at the field gate?
Afer ewe!
Why did the ram fall over the cliff?
He didn't see the ewe turn!
What do cows like to dance to?
Any kind of moosic you like!
Where do sheep get shorn?
At the baa baas!
What do you get if you cross a steer with a tadpole?
A bullfrog! |